Justin Achilli

Nobly, the heroes sallied forth to strike down the goblin foe plaguing the Thunder Plains. Ignobly, they were ground to paste, and only the aptly named elven avenger Angrist survived. A dead tiefling bard, a dead dragonborn paladin, and a dead eladrin wizard still remain as corpses on the battlefield.

The goblins came foridably to battle, bringing archers, infantry, and spellcasting support. Four sharpshooters, three hexers, and six skullcleavers crept across the plain to slaughter the pilgrimage, and, well, they did a damned fine job.

Neither side had a terrain advantage on the open plain, but the goblins' numbers and diversity gave them an insurmountable edge. Magic support plus ranged weapon support plus vigorous (if rudimentary) melee fighters equals 75 percent dead PCs.

The party spread itself too thin, you see, and the wily goblins filled in the gaps, isolating individual good guys and hacking them to flinders. Certainly, the monsters had the advantage of numbers, and they maintained that upper hand throughout the majority of the fight. Although supremacy teetered back and forth in the early stages of the fight, once the goblins had taken the lead, they kept it, to the bloody end.

Notable Positive Experiences: The avenger -- a movement-based class -- was the victim of a stinging hex that inflicted damage if he moved. Lo, the irony. Ultimately, while under the curse, he sucked it up and moved, which was a dramatic moment to see. A broad selection of enemies made for an interesting combat, as opposed to a lot of the same creature type, which makes for a fairly one-note encounter.

Notable Negative Experiences: The party separated early, so a lot of the synergies between party members just couldn't happen once the goblins had them on the ropes. The leader bard was isolated, so none of his battlefield control made a tinker's damn of difference. The wizard survived a few clumsy attacks on the part of the goblins, but was also isolated, and with any competency at all on the part of the enemy, would have been chum earlier than she already was.

Also, "just add more enemies" isn't that simple. Previous lunch scenarios had belonged entirely to the players. They had no reason to balance their per-level expenditures so they basically went in with all guns blazing. I doped up the number of enemies to challenge them more, but I added too many, and once the fix was in, it was lights out for the players, who should have still maintained the advantage.

It also didn't help that the scenario too two lunch periods to play, and they were three weeks apart. hey, we were busy. Anyway, this probably could have been solved with a greater degree of fine tuning.

Despite all this, I still can't take goblins seriously. Too much Warhammer or Warcraft, perhaps. I imagine my goblins more like those in the Lord of the Rings movies, but their presentation in much of fantasy roleplaying is more like misguided comic relief, kind of like green gnomes. Also, fifty-three hit points is a lot for a goblin jabroni.